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M&M: No amount of candy will be enough to bury it for good. (she points at her head) And she walks like she used to waddle.īEVERLY: You're supposed to make me feel better. M&M: She's got at least another whole person in here. M&M: She stole hard earned Halloween candy from her daughter, ditched work and checked herself into a seedy motel to eat it.īEVERLY: There's something wrong with me. Wash your hands, careful to remove any trace of peanut butter. Stick your finger in the jar of peanut butter. What can you eat? Open the pantry, look inside. Taste the salt slide down the back of your throat. Watch her walk away, board the bus.Ĭhoke back your tears. Make sure that hug lasts all day long.that she feels your arms around her even at recess when the mean kids pick on her because their moms don't hug them enough.
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Make sure to give him a little something worth coming back home to.Ĭheck on Sally. Sit down with Dave and Sally for breakfast. Up at five, go for a jog, take a shower, wake Sally, cook breakfastsomething healthy egg whites, flax, kale, organic coffee, sprouted wheat. She's just gonna lie.īEVERLY: I'm up every day at five. M&M: Come on Goodbar, let's get out of here. M&M: Sally≻ev's daughter, the pirate girl, the rightful owner of this here candyis not fat.
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The only pig feature about her were her tails. M&M: So Sally's a little chubby McChubster. Just cheese melted on a plate.īEVERLY: And of all the candy in the world, M&M, you're her favorite. The other day, I caught her melting cheese on a plate. The other kids eat the same things and they don't get fat. But I know why.īEVERLY: She can't help it. Kids are so mean!īEVERLY: She comes home in tears some days and won't tell me why. GOODBAR: (to Bev) How are you helping her?īEVERLY: Sally's not allowed to eat candy.īEVERLY: The kids at school. GOODBAR: (to M&M) See? She's helping her. M&M: I won't let you eat your daughter's candy! GOODBAR: And she made such a cute little pirate. GOODBAR: You stole this candy from your daughter? GOODBAR: And she never gets to eat candy. GOODBAR: For your information, she is giving herself a break. M&M: What the heck do you think you're doing? GOODBAR: If you can't eat candy when you're alone in a seedy motel room, when can you? It's okay.īEVERLY: Who are you? What are you doing here?!